Maid of honor duty

Maid of honour duty; there are some things to consider before making a decision. You might not have an immediate family or friends in your future that you would like to have as your maid of honor. If you are already planning a wedding, consider adding a close friend or relative to the mix.

1. Have the bride print out a list of photos she wants

The photographer doesn’t know the bride met the groom at a beach volleyball game and they thought it would be hilarious to have a photo spiking the bouquet. If you do not have a list of all these inside jokes or family poses (the photographer doesn’t know who is who) written on a checklist, they will not happen. Think about all the possible combos beforehand, write them down and bring the list with you. I have seen a family photo of mom, dad, bride and siblings get forgotten.

2. Go the extra mile on the big day.

Between nerves, lack of sleep, excitement and alcohol, getting the bride to eat is one of the hardest things to do. Having someone there to remind her to have a protein-fueled breakfast or snack and stay hydrated will be a lifesaver come ceremony time. Also, if your bride doesn’t have a wedding planner, it’s a nice gesture to offer to be her emergency contact.

That way, you can help traffic any small, overlooked details so that she doesn’t have to worry about constantly being in planning mode. Last but not least, encourage the new Mr. and Mrs. to spend some cherished time alone. Tell them to go stand on the outskirts of their wedding, up on a balcony overlooking the party, or outside looking in through the windows. They will be forever grateful to take a step back and take in this amazing celebration, surrounded by those they love most in the world.

3. Rock your reception speech.

One of the parts that maids of honor fear most about their role is delivering a speech at the wedding. Although public speaking can be daunting, this is an opportunity to make it pleasurable for the bride. My best advice is not to wing it, even if you think you can pull it off; At the very least, jot down key points that you can refer to throughout your speech so that you stay on topic.

Some of the best speeches I’ve heard throughout my career as a wedding planner have been the most classic, simple and genuine in context. Talk about the love the two share and their best qualities individually and how it makes them the best couple they could be. Speak from your heart, and it will be beautiful.

I would recommend leaving out any and all jokes about embarrassing the bride or sharing secrets; it’s just awkward and not the right time or place for it. Have a glass or two of champagne if you need to put your nerves to rest but don’t down a whole bottle of liquor or shots of tequila pre-speech. You don’t want to be that cringe-worthy inebriated speech-giver that everyone is watching in horror.

4. Be the bridesmaids’ go-to girl.

If you think scheduling one dress fitting is tough, imagine adding on six other ladies all living in different suburbs. Take control of helping everyone plan their hair appointments and making sure that everyone has the proper shoes, nail polish color, etc. The bride will be beyond grateful to have someone else managing all of these small details.

Some of my favorite maids of honor that I’ve worked with have been those who manage all of the correspondence between the bride and bridal party regarding the wedding timeline, pre-wedding parties and general responsibilities. From the bride’s perspective, it’s a tremendous relief to know that they have someone else they can go to with an emergency or question.

Another benefit of this secret communication is that you can arrange a few surprises for the bride throughout this process. For example, I know maids of honor who have hired a photographer for the bridal shower or treated the bride to an in-room massage on the morning of the big day.

5. Accompany the bride to wedding appointments.

Even though there will be many more appointments than a maid of honor could likely attend, it’s certainly nice to accompany the bride whenever possible. If she doesn’t ask, then it’s not necessary to insist on going, but it never hurts to offer extra help. One of the maid of honor duty is to attend are décor and event rentals, venue visits and of course, dress fittings.

These are just a few fun and meaningful experiences that you can experience together. Pretty much anything in the sphere of planning for the big day is fair game, although the bride will (or should) understand if not all dates can be met.

Among the maid of honor duty is to help the bride pick out bridesmaid dresses (although some may also want to choose independently), and help coordinate with the groomsmen.